Review TimeLords 

 

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TimeLords 2nd Ed. (1990)

BTRC

 

Date Reviewed: 1-18-04

Critical Kobold Rating:      (1 out of 5 Dice)

 

Time For a New Game.

 

 

 

     Note: (11/23/11) - After this review was published some years ago, this Kobold was contacted by Mr. Porter, the game's author, to discuss some other games that BTRC was producing. I was given the opportunity over the next several years to review some of Mr. Porter's other wares, many of which are listed on this site's Reviews page, and which you should check out.

 

     Mr. Porter also agreed to an interview, which you may read here. He was surprisingly tolerant of the harsh words this goblinoid reviewer had for the TimeLords rpg, and all in all, is a very decent fellow who deserves some of your cash. Go buy some of his games. 

 

 

 

 

"Adventure into forever..."


     TimeLords is an RPG with an original premise, if not an original theme. As you may expect from something with a title such as this, it's a lil' game about time travelers. The twist is, the game was written with the actual players in mind as participants. That is, the characters in TimeLords are s'posed to be the players themselves. PCs are created by basing their stats off of the players' real life abilities and attributes.

 

 

 
 

"Whataya mean, I've got a '4' Comeliness?!"
 

     There's nothing new to the Primary Attributes PCs have in this game. There's Strength, Intelligence, Constitution, Dexterity, Stamina, Perception, Willpower, Appearance, and Bravado. (There's also a Power attribute, if your referee wants to use mental powers in his campaign.) Bravado is your ability to bluff, fake it, or otherwise display some cojones in a tricky situation. The other attributes should be fairly familiar to gamers.

     Each attribute is rated as 1-20. However, since the PCs are avatars of the gamers, and let's face it, gamers are not known for being hot-bodied muscle-bound super-sly überhumans, most PCs will have very average scores (say in the 8-12 range).

     The book gives several suggestions for coming up with your own stats in PC form. The first is to have every player at the game rate you secretly, and the GM will then generate your average from these numbers. This may be a rude shock to some people; if you've always considered yourself a charismatic looker, but your friends all give you a "6" in Appearance, you could end up with a bruised ego.
 

     To avoid this, the book also gives methods for determining your stats in a more unbiased manner. For instance, you'll find your Strength by actually holding weights at arm's length with one arm for 5 seconds. Whatever weight in kilos you can support, you cross reference on a chart and find your game STR rating. Your high school SAT scores or the score of any IQ test you may have taken will compare to another chart to determine your INT. Situational modifiers such as, "You can't stay on a diet no matter how hard you try" will adjust your base Willpower score of 10 either up or down. You get the idea. This is a novel approach, and serves to come up with a rough estimate of your game alter-ego.

     Damage is taken on your Body Points, and is handled a bit differently than in most games. Instead of simply taking X amount of damage from attacks, subtracting X from your BP total, and dropping dead when you hit "0" BP, you instead take damage as a percentage of your BP. (So an attack doing 20 damage to someone with 60 BP has done 33% damage to that PC, but that same attack would do 50% damage to someone with only 40 BP.) The percentage of damage done to your PC affects her in various ways, usually by adjusting their other attributes and skill scores downwards until they heal.
 

 

 


"Is there a skill description for Loafing?"

 

     Skills are determined for PCs much the same way attributes are. The GM has a list of what must be 100 skills, and if you possess any of these in real life, well, your PC has 'em too. These can, obviously, be anything. Weapons experience, such as with hunting rifles or pistols, slingshots, or bows of course translates into weapons skills in the game. Wrestling, martial arts or boxing training means your PC will be one of the few who are actually adept at fighting in the game. [I mean, if you as a player aren't used to laying some whoop-ass on an actual flesh and blood person, then your PC ain't gonna be Bruce Lee either.] Trade skills such as woodcarving, blacksmithing, engineering, mechanical training, and whatever other freaky pastimes you're involved in are covered. And for those of us with less than squeaky clean pasts, there are such skills as torture, lockpicking, forgery, and wounding.

     Skills are rated 1 through 20 as well, with "1" being no experience with a skill at all (a default value), and "20" being a professional with upwards of 13 years of daily use with the skill. Again, players rate their skills according to a chart comparing real-life experience with the PC skill. For example, if you know how to drive a snowmobile, your character has that skill. If you the player "use this skill often, used actively a few times a month", then your PC's skill rating would be 10 + 1d2 in snowmobiling.

     Most task resolutions are determined on a "roll under" method, using a d20. If your skill plus modifiers is higher than the d20 roll, you succeed in using that skill. (So, you want to roll low in this game.)

     There is, lastly, a section of Advantages and Disadvantages to choose for characters, ranging from Magical Aptitude to Immunities to Weather Sense to Weight Problem to Phobia to Enemies. As I've said many many times, this game mechanic sucks ass. 'Nuff said. But it's there is you want it.



"Great. We're back in last Tuesday. Nice going, Frank."

 

     The idea behind TimeLords is that you, i.e. your PCs, are somehow involved in a temporal displacement incident. (That's 'time travel', to those of you who aren't up on your sci-fi lingo.) How this occurs is up to the GM, but it's done via a Matrix. This is a little metal object much like a twenty-sided die, but which was created waaaay in the future and is therefore far too technologically advanced for your little human mind to comprehend. Anyway, the PCs come upon this Matrix in some fashion, and before ya know it, POOF! they're transported to another moment in time. The fun starts here!

     Now, the exact type of temporal existence for your campaign will be up to the ref. Many movies and stories have been made with different explanations and paradoxes for time travel. In some, time is linear and singular, meaning any change in the past will affect everything that comes after it, thereby literally changing history. In others, temporal 'history' is actually a series of "mirror realities", where every possible version of history exists, and travelers just jump back in forth between these realities. (For instance, in some versions of history, the Nazis won WWII. Time travelers may find themselves in this 'history', and may be forced to try to 'correct' this version of past events so that the outcome of WWII mirrors the 'reality' of their own history.)

     Confused yet? Welcome to the life of a time traveler, pal!

     The point is, PCs jump around in time however the GM wants, using their Matrix device. They may be randomly and confusingly shifted into the past (like the character of Dr. Beckett in the excellent TV series Quantum Leap) or they may be part of a time police force whose job is to prevent tampering with the past by criminals (like Jean Claude Van Damme in Time Cop.)  The rule book gives some timelines chock full of important dates in history, from back at the formation of the planet Earth up to the year 2000, so novice GM's can get a taste of real-world history. A sample adventure's included in the book that sends the PCs back to Crete as it existed 3,500 years ago, so that they can acquire some written poetry. (Yeah, you read that right. Poetry. It's a linguistic thing.)

     The book also includes pages of equipment for your adventures, including weapons, armor, vehicles, and all the other junk that characters can accumulate as they live their imaginary lives. Rules are provided for futuristic gizmos, too, since time travel works backward and forward. Lasers, advanced medicines, and antigravity vehicles are touched on, as well as animals, both real and fantastic. A section is devoted to random world generation tables, so GMs can create alternate planets/ realities for their players to arrive on via their Matrix. The book is fairly complete in preparing gamers for the job of meandering through all known history (and unknown) without overburdening the GM with too much info. Just enough material is given to get a referee started on crafting her own inter-dimensional trans-temporal mayhem!


 



The GOOD



     The idea of having the players become their own characters is fun. Although it may take quite a while and effort to create yourself as a PC, it's fun to see how you'd fare as a game component rather than a gamer.

     As mentioned, the rules book is complete enough to get a campaign started, with loads of lists for arms, equipment, timelines, suggestions, and samples. Obviously, because of the time travel element, groups can explore every genre of game play, from historical D&D-type Medieval adventures to futuristic space opera, or the wild west, or Roaring 20's, or the Jurassic Era where dinosaurs ruled. (Well, they didn't really *rule*, per se, since they never set up a clear governmental system, aside from the "I'm Gonna Eat Your Head" system developed by the T. Rex political party…)



The NEUTRAL



     It seems that playing yourself as a PC might lose the shine after a campaign, or even a few adventures. Especially if you're not the mix of Lothario, Holmes, and Hercules you always imagined yourself as. So while quirky, the gimmick won't have much replay value. Also, there was never any line of published supplements for the game, so every single thing the GM runs will have to be designed from scratch, or borrowed from other published game lines. And really, if you're borrowing a lot of material from other time-travel game lines, wouldn't it maybe be easier to just play with another game in the first place?

 

     Let's explore this last thought further, in the Evil section...
 


The EVIL


     This is where I explain why TimeLords receives a One Die rating from this kobold.

     Holy. Crap.

     I have never seen a game with more charts, calculations, cross references, and numbers-rounding than this. The entire combat system is a horrifying mess of numbers, none of which stand by themselves. In order to simply shoot someone, there are rolls to hit, modified by cover, distance, weapon, handedness, attacker's injuries, etc. This is all pretty standard, sure... but then, the math has only just begun!

     Hits need to be calculated against which body part is struck, how much armor that body part has, how much damage is lethal and how much is stunning, what percentage of the BP the damage is equal to on that particular appendage, and then how that percentage affects that limb.
 

     Dudes, it goes on for pages. The author was, I suppose, going for a realistic action system. I would point out that when you're writing a game about time traveling, you need to shove the realism up your butt.

     I am truly astounded at the number of charts and tables this book contains. There are combat modifiers for everything, including right-handed people shooting towards the left side of their field of vision. Recoil damage. Rules for how long a crossbow may be held in a "ready" position before requiring Stamina rolls. I mean, it's like, they took every conceivable idea they had that would slow down or complicate combat, and made it an integral part of the game mechanics. I cannot imagine anyone playing this game actually paying attention to even a fraction of the rules designed for smacking someone around.
 

 
 

Here's just one sample chart from the combat section. I've taken trigonometry tests that were less imposing than this.

 

     Honestly, here is an example, verbatim, from the Combat section of the rules:

     "A person with 40 BP wearing 12/4 armor is hit in the leg with 20 points of Type II damage. The damage is greater than the armor, so the character takes 8 points of Type II damage. Checking on the UMC, this is a Damage Level of 4. Now, ¾ of this would be lethal and ¼ non-lethal, for a lethal roll on the "3" column, and a non-lethal roll on the "1" column. But, they add the bruising they took through the armor (the ABF), for a four column shift, to the "5" column for non-lethal damage (see previous example)."

     This is from the basic damage system! We haven't even gotten to the advanced optional rules yet! (I'm pretty sure they require an abacus and slide rule.)

     The author, Mr. Porter, truly loves minutiae and numbers. The weapons chart has twenty columns of info about each weapon. Granted, this may be thorough, but I don't find it necessary for a game of this caliber. Why is it important for every specific shotgun type to have an individual initiative modifier? Man, they're all pretty much the same, for game purposes.

 
 

 

     Yes, GMs can of course ignore any rules they don't like, as is their God given right as referee. However, I simply can't, in my old age, condone devising a complex mess of mathematics like this one to run something as fast as combat in an adventure game. It would be different if TimeLords, like some other role playing games involving lords of time, discouraged combat... but the rules flat out state that, "Combat will occur in the course of play" (emphasis is the author's).

     Anyway, while I truly enjoy the idea of a time traveling campaign, and I have owned several role playing games incorporating this theme, I cannot recommend TimeLords as a good choice for this genre. The majority of the presented material is otherwise useful, and I could certainly use some of it in other games. (Specifically, the equipment, weapons, and random-world generating tables are fabulous to incorporate into other rpgs.) But the mind-wrenchingly tedious combat system brings the fun to a halt faster than you can say "Doctor Who?"
 

     Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna see if this twenty-sider can transport me back to a time when the author was drafting his combat rules, and whack him with this abacus…
 

 
 

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