Superthief

by Chris Cecil

(To the tune of “Superfreak”, by Rick James

She's a very slinky girl
The kind you don't let count your GPs.
She will never let your party down
With her dexterous, sneaky feats (ow girl)

She opens locks for our band
She checks for traps and listens for noise.
When she makes her move to your room it's at night time
You’ll never hear a peep. (Oh, no.)

That girl is climbing walls now
The girl's a super thief.
The kind of thief you’re warned about
In taverns, inns, and streets.

That girl is pretty sneaky
The girl's a super thief
She always hides in shadows
She never can be seen.

She's all right, she's all right
That thief’s all right with me, yeaaaaah….
Hey, hey, hey, HEY!

She's a super thief, super thief
She's pickin’ pockets, yow!
Super thief, super thief

She's a very prepared girl (The kind of girl you want to know)
From her flint down to her lockpicks (Daggers in her boots, yeah )
And she'll go with us to dungeons with her loot bag
To look for jewelry (Going back in style, now)

Locked doors mean naught to her, she says
"In the throne room, I'll be waiting,"
When we get there she's swiped silver, gold, and platinum
And picked the treasury clean. (Oh, no)

That girl is pretty wild now
The girl's a super thief
The kind of girl who backstabs,
And Thieves’ Cant she can speak.

That girl is getting’ XP
The girl's a super thief
She’s hearing noise behind doors
And creeping stealthily.

She's all right, she's all right
Say, where’d my coin pouch go, waaaaiiiiit….
Hey, hey, hey, HEY!