Lil' Bitchin' Gnome

by Chris Cecil

(To the tune of Little GTO, with respect to Ronnie and the Daytonas)

Little bitchin' gnome, you're really rolled-up fine.
Three classes and some high stats, standing two –foot- nine.
Armed him with a magic short sword, hit points are sky hiiii-iii-iiigh.
C'mon I rolled 'im up, love him so, let's go play, bitchin' gnome!

Waaa waaaaaaaa! Wa wa wa wa wa wahhh!
Waaa waaaaaaaa! Wa wa wa wa wa wahhh!
Waaa waaaaaaaa! Wa wa wa wa wa wahhh!

You oughta' see him in a dungeon, or in a dragon's lair.
This little half-pint fighter, oh he adventures with flair.
He beats the goblins and the half-orcs, really drives them wiiiiii-iii-iild.
C'mon and run a game, I wanna play, check him out, bitchin' gnome!

Waaa waaaaaaaa! Wa wa wa wa wa wahhh!
Waaa waaaaaaaa! Wa wa wa wa wa wahhh!
Waaa waaaaaaaa! Wa wa wa wa wa wahhh!

Gonna save all my money, and buy a mini figure
With a helmet and a back pack, bad-ass paint job for sure.
Take it out to conventions, and let 'em know (yeah yeah)
That he's got the biggest nose around.
Demihuman, gonna shut you down
When I bring him out, start a game, play him now, bitchin' gnome!