Brilliant Disguise

by Chris Cecil

(To the tune of “Brilliant Disguise” by Bruce Springsteen)

We are comrades in arms
On dungeon forays
What is that spell whispered, partner,
Just as you turn away?
Well, we scryed you last night
As we healed up in town.
Mage tried to read your mind
To know just what we’ve got with you hanging around.

So tell me what I see
When I look for allies.
Is it you, half-elf
Or doppelganger disguise?

I heard somebody call your name
At first you didn’t respond.
I saw you sell off your short sword
Of which you had been fond.
Well, I’ve tried so hard lately
But I just can’t see
Why a good elf like you
Now grins evilly.

So tell me who I see
When we sneak into lairs.
Is that our dexterous thief
Who just tripped down the stairs?

Now look at me, buddy
Struggling to kill gnolls in a fight
You who you used to love combat
now laugh at my plight?
I’m a bit irritated
You don’t seem like yourself.
I want to know if it’s you we don’t trust
(You’ve got damn sharp teeth for an elf.)

Now you walk behind the party.
You used to be ‘point man’.
Did you just slip a knife
Into the palm of your hand?

We snuck in the wyrm’s lair.
The dragon snored; he was deep asleep.
But just one question, friend:
Well could you not hold that thunderous sneeze?!

So when I look at you
I’m gonna look hard and look twice.
This Gem of Seeing
will penetrate your ‘ganger disguise.

Tonight our band is sure
We’ve fallen for your shapechanging plot.
Gods have mercy on the man
Who doubts what he's sure of.